As I’m cleaning also, I’m probably going to organize a secondhand sale of a bunch of stuff, some fandom shit, some pins I’ve had forever, maybe a book or two. Just to make some extra funds between jobs and such.

Cleaning the house today and struggling. Falling into depression slumps and being stuck with such a mess on mass feels so embarrassing, but I need to get it clean. I need to get this done.

job things are in the works. thinking about workwear.

To the students who are on campus right now for various programs and educational opportunities, I love you so much. These kids are always very kind, but getting offered a full meal after not having the chance to eat all day is huge. It was leftovers they were kindly offering but for me it’s driving away my headache.

I am desperate for a world where people don’t have to live like me. In a series of hormonal unknowns. Unanswered medical questions and body changes so young I don’t have a concrete answer for my gender anymore. The only place I feel myself is in the company of lesbians, women who made themselves women and the shades and hues that surround butch identity that make me feel whole. The raw variety of our bodies, experiences and minds is like art to me. I feel at home when I feel our joy. Discovering I was a lesbian changed my life.

I’ve been particularly unable to focus on anything today. Even with my medication being taken, the expectation I’d be fueled to fill out more applications or do something productive. I kind of just feel numb?

I’ve applied for eight jobs in the less than 24 hours after being told I’m being let go. I’m honestly trying to avoid the student and federal work study route all together, because I cannot take another round of having a semi-stable job jerk me around because the university system is so poorly run.

Just as I was talking about struggling with the summer. I just got told I’m being let go due to budget cuts, my last day is June 30th.